What the Hell Theater

If you're going to drink, don't drive. And if you're going to drink and drive, don't try to high-five a cop. That's the lesson learned by a Pennsylvania motorist on February 19th, according to the Altoona Mirror. When Gerald C. Decker, 27, was pulled over by a Pennsylvania cop for driving without his headlights on, he wanted to show his gratitude with a "thanks, buddy" by slapping the lawman some skin. But the officer noticed Decker was apparently inebriated, so he left him hanging. "That's not how it works," the cop said. Decker reportedly failed field sobriety tests, and was arrested -- and later charged with DUI when he flunked a blood test. He was also charged with driving on a suspended license, careless driving, and, yes, driving without headlights.

Niceville, Florida police report a woman heading off to work got quite a shock when she tried to get in her car only to see a child she didn't know playing inside of it. The woman called the cops, who rushed to the scene and began searching nearby homes for open doors or any other place from where the tyke could have wandered, reports NWFDailynews.com. Eventually, police were able to coordinate her call with a report of a man who had been running down the street calling for help; his girlfriend's son had apparently slipped out of her house. Eventually, the boy's mother came to pick him up.